i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
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