Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
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