We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
