I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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