i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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