Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
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