You work out of a Hotel?
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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