so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
Randomize
