Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize