It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
