the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
