You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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