$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize
