handjob tips. give me some.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Found your dick twin last night
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
