So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
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