It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Randomize
