Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize