im holly from the hills drunk
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Randomize