Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
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