suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Randomize
