How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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