I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
