taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Randomize
