I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Randomize
