she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO