Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I'm too high and old for this...
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
