Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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