I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Randomize
