we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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