hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
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