i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Randomize
