Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
how drunk are you?
Several
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize
