White coat. Heels.
There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
You left your phone here
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