Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
