so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
