it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Randomize
