quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
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