we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
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He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
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it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
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