she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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