don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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