i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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