If i come over, it means nothing
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Randomize
