It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize
