So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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