i was rollin on her like bob the builder
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
love makes seman taste better
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Randomize
