i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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