is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
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