hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
