Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Randomize
