I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize