I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
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