yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
the day after is always just damage control
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
